OBLIGATORY OBITUARY

Seems most obit writers choose “passed away”
Puh-lease, people die, they don’t pass away
And you don’t know for sure they are now in the arms of the lord either
Or that they’ve escaped their chains
Or departed this earth (in fact, they’re still here)

I’m angry when I read “died in Afghanistan”
And heartbroken to be notified
A newborn “was only moments in arms, but will be forever in our hearts”
I marvel to discover “she celebrated her 100th birthday, and then died peacefully”
Cautioned to learn “was killed by a hit-and-run driver” (probably drunk driver)

And pained at the revelation “died unexpectedly”
Knowing then they never had a chance to say goodbyes
I’ve never read, “was cruelly murdered by an evil scum bag”
But then you never get the details in the obligatory obituary.